^ (n a v i g a t e) ^
15:56:45, 2001-02-09
becoming a study in sleep deprivation; eyes shot, spinning, dry mouth bitter taste, adn in need of an iv to keep me nourished while i sleep for days... i don't have insomnia, i simply don't sleep. hope i wake up early tomorrow and fall hopelessly asleep tomorrow night. not going to happen... ...i'm a wreck...i'm taking years off of my life as we speak.
when you choke a smurf, what color does he turn?
is lamenting a waste of time? I seem preoccupied from myself lately. it's the time of year i believe. who can be coherent at 6:30 am though (so what if this is copied from real paper)
i can remember the days of yore, many moons ago, functioning onmind-meltingly low hours of sleep and working 10 hours the next day or dozing off in theology class as a direct result of insomnia/noctournality. yes, i just created a word. yes, i'm comfortable with that. the first rule of sleeplessness is you do not talk about sleeplessness. at least i'm winning the war on keeping myself sane for the time being... i'm not even writing what i sat down to write here... why am i such a milquetoast in the face of truth? i am afraid that i will not be the only one to read this and it blocks me from truth and locks me into this filibuster drivel... i can't let go. i have NO trust. none. defense mechanisms-in-tow...
this has beena failed attempt, but an attempt nonetheless.
eric will not write what he means here tonight, and it will undoubtedly become a recurring theme, so fuck right off.
"renown and grace is dead, and the mere lees are left the vault to brag of"
